Ok, I'm back....

Hey all!  Happy New Years!!!!! 

Ok, so I decided really last minute since I had about a week off from work that I would take the opportunity to go and see my Mom. I'm a horrible child because I did the math and it seems it's been about 5 years since I've seen her. I know, I know.....I'm such a bad daughter.  I've been really missing her lately and although we talk frequently, it's just not the  same. 

I think about her relationship with my older boys and how fortunate they've been because they had been around her daily for the first 10 and 8 years of their lives.  When she moved out to MD they would visit every year for their summer vacation and then we would also drive out there periodically throughout the year to visit.  My daughter has only seen her a handful of times and spent the summer once because she could never handle being away from me for extended periods of time.  The one summer she did stay she cried everyday until it was time to come home.  Then K3 comes along and he's never met her. That is until this trip. 

My Mom had NO IDEA; not an even an inkling that we were coming.  Hubby had to work, so unfortunately he was unable to come.  So we get to my Mom's apartment and we're standing outside the door.  I call her and ask her (which was stupid since it was a Sunday) if she got the package I sent.  She's tells me "no" and asks what I'm talking about.  I tell her I sent a package and they were to deliver it about 3 that day.  She starts going into a story about how they never knock on her door when things are delivered to her, they will knock on the storage door and the neighbors door, but can never manage to knock on hers and that it was probably just left on the porch.  I can hear her talking through the door as she's coming to check.  Then I hear her opening the door and we're all standing there just waiting.  I ask her "did you get it..."  I'm so silly and she telling me she's opening the door... Then surprise.  It took her a minute to realize it was us because she was having a hard time seeing through the screen door.  Then "OH MY GOODNESS...Ger (I'll explain that another time) is that you?"  Then she's grabbing the kids hugging and kissing them and picks up the baby.  It was hilarious. 

The baby (K3) who is normally pretty shy and stuck to my hip when he first meets someone just hugs and kisses her and is like "Hi Grandma Joan!" acting like he's been around her all his life.  We all sat and caught up for a bit and then she starts apologizing for not having anything to feed us and how she wishes she had known we were coming so she could have prepared for the visit.  I'm telling her that we wanted to surprise her and that she doesn't need to be going to any trouble trying to take care of us.  But that's just how my mom is.

My mom will be 69 in March, and although that's never really seemed old to me, just seeing her has the reality that my she really IS aging setting in.  She has arthritis, which she's have for YEARS and polymyalgia, and some trouble with her vision but is otherwise pretty healthy.  She smokes like a chimney which she's done since long before I was even thought of and that drives me insane. Fortunately she doesn't have any health problems from that.   I have an older brother that's 48 that lives with my mom because he has a mental disability and it makes me SO sad that it's just the two of them and there's no one there to help take care of them.  My mom and brother basically live off of her social security and my brothers disability so needless to say there income is really limited.  I'm not really pleased about there housing conditions either, although I have to say I've seen worse. 

Needless to say this visit opened my eyes to quite a few things.  My Mom is not going to be here forever (something could happen to anyone of us at any given time) and for me to let so much time pass without seeing her is inexcusable.  My Mom is pretty active but still needs a lot of help doing certain things. I want to be able to be there for her and my brother.  I want to be able to SEE for myself on a daily basis that they are doing ok and taking care themselves.  I don't like the idea of them both just being out there all by themselves with no help; I can't even explain what that does to my heart. 

When I got home and talked to Hubby about the visit he said exactly what I had been thinking on my drive back home.  He said that we need to move her with us.  Not that we're in the greatest financial situation, but we can help out a lot.  Plus there's the added benefit of just being able to be close to her and see her on a daily basis, so I'm excited.  When I talked to her about the possibility of moving she seemed pretty open to it.  I guess my brothers not real thrilled about it, but she feels he'll adjust which I'm pretty certain of also. 

I wasn't able to take pictures since I no longer have a camera, so I did a lot of video recording.  I'll have to have Hubby figure out how transfer the video from the video recorder to my computer to I can upload it.  I was so sad when I had to leave and was hugging her and crying my eyes out.  Who ever would have thought at 38 I'd be crying about missing my Mommy so much.  I remember being little and crying and begging my mom to take me to work with her because I didn't want her to leave me. It's funny how we come full circle. Lol  Oh, I did manage to get some pictures from my mom that I've been trying to get for YEARS.  She finally made copies so I lucked out and got a few.  So for your viewing pleasure...... Lol

Well that's it for the pictures.  Thanks for going down memory lane with me.  When I look at some of these pictures it amazes me how fast time flies.  I remember the CA picture and that day being outside taking pics.  There's another one somewhere this day of me pushing my sister out of the picture because I wanted to take it by myself.  I have to say, I was a little spoiled brat and I don't know how my mom put up with me.  I remember throwing tantrums so bad when she had to go to work and one day clowning so bad she gave in and took me with her.  I remember crying another time because I wanted to go to the airport with her and AGAIN she gave in and took me with her.  Later that day we got home and I threw another fit because I missed out on a trip to the park with my sister and brother.  I was horrible.  Lol.  I remember finding out my mom was pregnant with my little brother and being SO happy I wasn't going to be the baby anymore and excited about having a little sibling.  Its funny how I can remember things that happened YEARS ago, but cant remember conversations from just a few days past.  Pitiful. 

Alright people, I'm checking out.  I'm off tomorrow, so I'm up later than usual and am not really tired since I took an extra long nap this afternoon. Hubby and I always have a great afternoon nap on Sundays, but he usually wakes up before I do.  He's knocked out right now though and I'm debating on waking him for a little late night activity.  LOL  But he's sleeping so peacefully I almost don't want to.  ALMOST. 

Everyone have a good week.  Peace and Blessings!! 

links: digg this    del.icio.us    technorati